Self care is one of the most important things a person can do for themselves, but so often, parents and caregivers find it difficult for self care. When my children were young, finding time for myself seemed impossible and I felt guilty for taking care of myself. I got burnt out and touched out and then I would become a monster and yell. I yelled much over things that were not important and over things that could have been solved, by connecting with my children and understanding where they were coming from. I’m getting better with my self care and have found a few things that I use.
1. Washing face or hands It’s a simple self care ritual I have, but it has helped me so much. I’ve never been one to wear makeup, but I’m starting to use skin care products and for me it helps. The warm or hot water on my hands or face just helps me focus myself. Plus the simple act, especially, when washing my hands calms me when I am stressed out.
2. Shower or bath Again another water related thing, but water helps calm me. It is easier for me to take baths or showers because my children are older and don’t need constant attention. When my children were little a bath was a luxury.
3. Yoga Yoga has been one of the most restorative things that I have done for myself. I currently follow Yoga with Adrienne https://yogawithadriene.com/ because she has some very awesome short 5 minute yoga sessions and she has a great yoga for manual laborers, which helps me after a long 12 hours working in a factory.
4. Sleep Sleep is so important, but is often a self care item we overlook. I am very guilty of this. I work 12 hour swing shifts and I loose a lot of sleep because of my work schedule. It is this lack of sleep that has made me realize just how important it is for myself and for all of us. New parents also lack sleep because of having a newborn and a young baby or young children around. The best thing to offer new parents is a nap and let them sleep.
Running The best self care that I can give myself is to go for a run. What I gain from running is more than just physical. Running is my moving meditation. I forget everything when I run because I am so focused on the way my body feels out in nature. I focus on my breath, the way my feet land on the ground, I focus on the way the breeze hits my body, the sound of birds, the animal tracks I see. It is moving meditation and it is the best self care I use for myself because it brings me closer to myself and the world around me.
These are a few of the things I use to care for and center myself. Many of them only take a few moments, but those few moments are a tremendous help to me. I am better able to connect with my children if I have taken care of myself first. We need to encourage parents and caregivers to take time for self care and we need to give parents and caregivers that time. We need to stop shaming parents and caregivers for taking time for self care because that self care is important for them, their children, and their families.
Nurturing Positive Connections 